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So, you dumped your girlfriend and now you want her back. You feel thoroughly miserable and you miss your girlfriend badly. You now realise what a terrible mistake you made, and you know you shouldn’t have dumped the girl. How are you going to convince your ex girlfriend that she should come back to you? How are you going to win back her trust? How can you show her you are sorry?

There is no point in you rushing around like a headless chicken. You need to take stock, make a plan and take things one step at a time. Don’t send your ex girlfriend expensive gifts, don’t even send her flowers. This would look as if you are trying to buy her back. Don’t phone your ex and whimper and whine about how much you miss her. You won’t earn respect behaving like that. Your ex girlfriend will probably be delighted to kick you while you are down, and you can’t really blame her if she feels that way.

If you are going to win your girlfriend’s love and trust back again, you have to be worthy of respect. You need to be strong and act like a man. You need to be prepared to accept the blame for what you did. You need to be ready to apologise unreservedly.

Before you make any attempt to see your ex or to speak to her, you need to get some thinking done. Why did you do something as damaging and dramatic as dumping your girlfriend in the first place? Your ex will almost certainly require an apology from you. She definitely deserves one. This is one of those situations where just saying “sorry” isn’t enough. You need to say “sorry, I was an idiot”, but that is not all. There are two further things you must be able to do:

1. You must be able to explain why you dumped the girl;

2. You must be able to convince her that you would never repeat that behaviour.

Make a completely sincere apology. If you dumped your girlfriend because you had cold feet about the whole relationship and commitment scene, be honest. If you try to gloss over your behaviour, your ex will most likely sense that you are keeping something from her. She won’t be able to put her trust in you if she knows you are not being honest over such a crucial matter. If you can explain the feelings that overwhelmed you, she will be more receptive towards you.

Be prepared to be kept at arm’s length. You might be aching to get the relationship back to how it was. Your girlfriend, however, will probably need some time to sort out her own feelings. She will also need time get over the hurt you inflicted. Even if she missed you badly, it might take some time for her to start trusting you again.

Don’t try to hurry things along if your ex wants to take things slowly. Acting impatiently won’t do any good. It would also be unfair. After all, you created this situation. Your girlfriend didn’t ask you to dump her and then change your mind.

You have to give the girl time to get over her injured feelings. Her pride will have been hurt by what you did, and she will not want that experience repeated. Her friends will probably be advising her not to trust you. It might take time for you to earn her trust. If you are sorry you dumped your girlfriend, and want her back, you have to learn to be patient.

Chances are that if the two of you still have feelings for each other, you will get your dumped girlfriend back, but you have to be prepared to work at getting your ex back.

Learn more about how to get your love back. Watch our free video and find out how to get your ex to fall in love with you again